My mom was a stay-at-home mom until my youngest sister started school. When that happened, my mom became an elementary school music teacher, and boy was she good! She loved her job and the students she taught (most of the time), but after 20 years of teaching, she finally retired last year. Ahhh! The good life! My mom looked forward to lots of relaxing and vacationing, and basically just doing whatever she wanted, whenever she wanted.
Well, in the year since my mom retired, she has had a daughter lose a baby at 17 weeks of pregnancy, her mother-in-law died and her estate had to be settled, then her father died and his house had to be sold, and then finally I gave birth to a little boy who we weren't sure would even make it, but had brain surgery and is now thriving and adjusting to life. In every one of those situations, my mom showed up to help, mourn, support, and serve. These visits have taken her to Dallas, Utah on several occasions, and to our house TWICE in three weeks. I know that my mom would have LOVED to do other things during these experiences, and she had to sacrifice a lot to be able to help. But I also know these experiences ended up being some of the most sacred in her life.
I can't speak for the others she helped, but I can say that on my end of things, I didn't have to even ASK her to come, she just volunteered and did it. When I found out I was being induced, she and my dad jumped in the car immediately and made their way here to help. I will always remember when they walked into the hospital room after Flint was born, how Brock and I both collapsed in their arms in tears. We had been brave and strong all day and finally we had someone there to be strong for us. When Flint's surgery was finally scheduled, my mom and dad both drove up and spent the week taking care of them so Brock and I could both be with Flint and focus on him.
I have always been very independent and as an adult, never really needed my mom. I honestly think that is a tribute to the kind of parent she is, because she raised me to be able to take care of myself. However, this whole ordeal with Flint has had me running to her in tears on multiple occasions. And ALWAYS, she has been there to catch me when I needed it. She has listened when I needed it and shared wisdom when I couldn't come up with the right answer. She has given of herself by taking care of my kids so I didn't have to worry about them and not once did she even joke about it being difficult. I'm sure it was hard for her to take care of my four big kids when she's been "retired" from that kind of parenting for so long, but she jumped right in and didn't complain once.
No less deserving of this tribute has been my dad. He's always been right there beside my mom and has missed work and given up pay to be able to be here. He's helped me stand when it was hard to do it on my own. He's not afraid to cry with me and has helped me sort out my feelings and fears.
Most important, both of my parents have continually pointed me to the source of the only TRUE comforter, my Heavenly Father, and their wisdom and calmness have brought hope and faith to me when I struggled.
I am sure that Brock would say the same thing about the support he has received from his parents. I know they have been a calming and powerful influence for him as he has gone through this as well. We are both blessed by good parents who know what it means to truly parent. They know that parenting adult children means that there are some things that you DO retire from; they know it's not their business how we raise our kids, where we live, how we manage our money, or what jobs we choose to take. But for all the other aspects of parenting - the loving, supporting, listening, and "showing up," they know that is something they will never retire from! I really don't know how we could have managed the last 5 months without their support, and I felt I would be ungrateful if I didn't publicly acknowledge all they've done for our family.
Believe me though, I REALLY hope that the next year brings a much more relaxing retirement to my mom. Not only does she deserve it, but hopefully, that will mean that things have calmed down a little bit for all of us!
You are so blessed! I love your mom so much.
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